msjorje: (starry night)
I dreamed I was holding a dog... a golden retriever, maybe. He had peanut butter in his mouth and was suffocating on it. I think I was standing in a pool for some reason. Just as he was almost dead, it occurred to me to reach in and clear his airway. He survived.

I've started worrying about random people in my life suddenly dying. When I woke up and told Elmo about my dream, my face started leaking. No sobbing, just tears streaming. Three memorial services in less than two months. I've had my fill. No one else is allowed to die for awhile. Give me a chance to breathe, damn it.

Melissa is driving in from Texas today... a 6 hour drive. I so badly want her to safely arrive already so I can stop worrying.


Jun. 30th, 2010 07:52 am
msjorje: (starry night)
I guess I stayed in bed PLENTY last night! I had several dreams that I want to get down this morning before I forget.

I dreamed that Justin (Elmo's best friend) & Siobhan (his long time GF, who isn't welcome in my home) came to stay with us. She immediately started pissing me off and I texted Elmo to say that I already regretted letting her come to stay. I got a text back that said something to the effect of "too late" but I think SHE had actually read and replied to my text, not Elmo. She was being her usual oblivious, rude self in my dream. I was asking her to move something out of the way so I could do something and she just wasn't getting it. Since she couldn't see why I needed the things moved, she wasn't moving them. She was basically putting them more into the way.

There were other people in our home, too. But those two were staying with us. Later, in what I think was the same dream, Joe & Jenny and the kids joined us as well. We were in a big home with a big dining room and lots of people. I overheard Joe saying something nice in reference to me. I was taken by surprise so I went into the dining room to see what was going on. I joined in with the meal which seemed to be a sort of pot luck. Adrian Rolle was there, too. Joe, Jenny and myself got along quite nicely in my dream.

Then, in what may have been a separate dream of perhaps a continuation, I was in a really big garage with my dad and he was griping that he didn't like it. Something about where the doors were bothered him. It was his garage and had to have been nearly 2 stories tall (but with no second floor). It had about 5-6 doors on either side and was very clean and empty. I was trying to think of different ways he could use it to get around the features that bothered him.

The garage may have lead into a big trip that included my Girl Scout troop and my mom, at least. There may have been many others. We were splitting into several different vehicles and debating who was riding in which. Then we were at another meal. This time it was a lot of children (family and scouts) at the table. Sasha was in my lap. I think we may have been traveling to an aquarium because Sasha copied, clear as day, "Fish Place, Yay!" I was terribly impressed and asked my mom, who was at the end of the table, if she heard. She had. Sasha didn't seem much older, if any, than she is now, so the words really impressed me.
msjorje: (Default)
I've had a few dreams lately, in the rare moments of sleep I manage to snag. So last night I had an interesting dream...

I lived in an even bigger home, overlooking a hill (kind of like Matthew Warren Smith's place). I was hosting a GS Leader meeting. Elmo wasn't home, for some reason. Sasha was still a baby. And who should appear on my doorstep, but Keith Ford (Becca's ex-husband)! Now we haven't seen him since he was engaged. He was marrying a Catholic and even attending Catholic Marriage counseling with her beforehand. This is strange because Keith had previously been an atheist and was generally against organized religion of any sort.

Joe & I had the two of them over for dinner and it was like having strangers as guests. We didn't' know her anyway, but this was also not the Keith we knew. It was really weird. We simply wished him all the happiness in the world, and lost all of hope of seeing him socially. We were obviously not the type of people with whom he'd be socializing. I heard rumors that he kept up with the yard duties, etc. These things just were not very Keith. It was like he became a Stepford Keith or something.

So for him to turn up on my doorstep... strange. He came in and we sat down in a room away from the GS Leaders. He filled me in on how Catholicism was evil and his marriage had only lasted a year.

That was pretty much it. Something woke me and I lost the dream. Perhaps Keith was in my dream because Veronica recently referred to him. We have a pic of him holding her. He doesn't like children. I tricked him into holding her for the pic and it is in her scrapbook. She thought he didn't like kids except her. No, he just didn't like kids, period.

I had another dream when I went back to sleep, but I don't recall it at the moment.

EDIT: So I found him on FB, surprisingly. I requested to add him as a friend. And he then apparently hid his profile. I figured he might decline, but I didn't think he'd remove or hide himself! So weird.
msjorje: (starry night)
After posting that about my milk supply, I dreamed that I was at work and grabbed a bottle to pump. Only instead of pumping with my electric pump, I grabbed my breast to manually pump. One squeeze and I filled the bottle half way! One more and it was a full 4+ ounces! I was considering grabbing another bottle.
msjorje: (starry night)
I forgot to post about this yesterday... Early Wednesday morning I finally dreamed about Sasha! I've had day dreams of Elmo with Sasha or of holding and nursing Sasha, but I never actually SEE an actual baby. It is more of a feeling than a vision. That is how I tend to dream the most, I think. Well early yesterday morning I DID dream about her! I had a dream of being in L&D and the staff setting her on my upper belly, face down (like they are supposed to). I was rubbing her back to help her stay warm and to rub in any vernix she still had on her. So this was a pretty specific dream. It was good and perhaps set my hopes for the day.

I told Elmo about the dream as soon as I woke up and promptly forgot about it for the rest of the day. It was definitely a good dream and gave me a nice warm feeling.

We took a couple of walks (labor inducer) yesterday and I stood/rocked and walked around the house quite a bit. Mostly I just needed to be off of my butt, but it was a good activity to do. As the sun began to sink in the sky, though, I began to feel a bit down about another day passing without labor. Then Elmo feels helpless to make me feel better. Just being close helps. I really miss being able to cuddle up with him at night. I REALLY REALLY miss it! :'(

Now I've gone and made myself cry. Sigh.
msjorje: (starry night)
I made it to bed on time last night. Once again, I stood there, over the bed... dreading the night. I climbed into bed, waited for the BH contraction to pass and tried to find a good position. I had trouble falling asleep. The spot at the top of my leg hurt from the bed already. I switched to the other side and it still took me a bit to fall asleep. I woke about 10-15 minutes later... this was just not going to work.

I finally caved. I grabbed my robe, pillow, and a small blanket to take downstairs. I settled onto the lounge chair. It was a little odd to try to sleep there, in the quiet darkness. I usually nap there with the television going. Then, sleep came. I woke often enough that I would normally be turning over, but drifted right back off to sleep each time.

Elmo came down about 2 (my alarm was set for 4). Strangely, he'd had a nightmare that I left him - then he woke up and I was missing from the bed. He settled in on the couch and went back to sleep. When I woke at 4, I gave myself a few minutes to get awake and wondered how my legs would do when I stood...

While my feet were a little tender when I first stood up, there was no stiffness! I slept well, I rose well! Yay!

Now... to survive another week of work... Sigh. I gotta finish getting ready now!


Aug. 12th, 2009 03:41 am
msjorje: (pregnancy)
I've been having Braxton Hicks contractions for a couple of days now. We had birthing class last night. I swear I dreamed all night about being in labor and at the hospital with Elmo & Mom. It was kind of crazy.
msjorje: (starry night)
I had a dream that I got fed up with my hair and started to shave it. It got most of one side before I remembered that I was growing it out... for Elmo! I felt SO bad! Then I woke and realized it was just a dream. Whew!

Baby Dream

May. 10th, 2009 08:46 am
msjorje: (starry night)
So far I hadn't had any dreams about or including the baby. Friday night I didn't sleep well (for about the 3rd night in a row) and I had another strange dream. This time, including the baby!

I was sitting at my mother's place with my belly showing. Mom & Serena were both watching my belly for any movement. Then we saw a little bit of baby. Mom gasped with excitement. Then we saw MORE of the baby! We could see the outline of the ear through my skin, then the face! Before long, it was like the baby was sitting up on my spine and full sized! The baby's feet were sticking up almost into my face! I said "no wonder he kicks so hard!" It looked like the baby was stuck under a thick rain coat or something. Then the baby was reaching up and then lowering his hands, like he was trying to get out from under all that belly skin.

It was so damned bizarre! Especially considering that we weren't freaking the fuck out in the dream, either! I remember wondering if the baby could breathe and whether I needed to get a knife to help the baby out of my belly.
msjorje: (starry night)
I didn't sleep very well (again) last night. I'm sure the pregnancy can be blamed, but still... I thought I'd get my strange dream(s) posted...

I woke up several times and so waking became part of the dream, too...

Elmo & I were sleeping next to each other (exactly as we actually were), but we were inside a large cave... not sure if we were on our bed or just cave floor. Across the room (past our feet) was the man that played Steven Keaton on Family Ties. He was sleeping, too... just behind some grouping of stalagmites. I woke, sat up slightly, and looked over toward him and saw a large dog run off to my left from there. I worried about his wellbeing as this large dog had just come from where he was sleeping. I was trying to ask if he was alright. The dog(s) came back a few times and I shooed them away with a small rubber flogger (which I bought last Saturday). The dog was approaching me now, but was easily scared off. Suddenly the dog coming to bother me was Choopy (Veronica's dog - it still lives at the house with her). I started shooing him away, but then realized he was simply begging to go outside. I finally got up to take him out, fumbling around about how I should grab clothes or at least a robe. I noticed he was about to just shit the floor, so I rushed him to the front door of the apartment (that's right - no more cave) and let him out. He went right down the stairs to the grass. A bag lady was walking around the corner with a grocery basket of stuff (not groceries). I worried that Choopy might not come back after he crapped, but as soon as he was done I praised him and called to him and he came right back up the stairs.

Elmo & I woke and I told him about part of the dream. He said the actor's name (that played Steven Keaton) was Texas something. sidenote: In my dream he was right, though it was actually Michael Gross. Gross also played in the Tremors series of movies, which we watched together a month or two ago. I said I think Texas died recently. I seemed to recall seeing it posted here or somewhere.

All through the night, as I woke (I think), I had one line of a song running through my head over and over again. It continued until we listened to the radio on the way to work. The song line was "I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you" from the AT&T commercial. It was just the one line, though slight variations (read: wrong versions) of it.

Then Elmo and I actually woke up. I told him about the dream on the way to work. He was surprised at the amount of detail I recalled. I think it helped that I kept actually waking up, and that I was telling the tale so early in the morning.

I always dream strange things. This one was just... somehow extra weird because I dreamt I kept waking and I really kept waking. Bizarre how it all blurred together.


Nov. 1st, 2008 08:19 am
msjorje: (eyes)

We recently watched Jeepers Creepers I and 2. I had seen maybe half of Jeepers Creepers. It was pretty good, as scary movies go. There was some very typical theme stuff, like a brother and sister on the road in the middle of nowhere together, but I liked that the bad guy was very different from other movies. He was original. I liked the second one alright, too, but it really bugged me that the bad guy always looked so WET. I don't remember him looking that wet in the first movie (and we had JUST watched it).

Last night we watched House on Haunted Hill. That one was pretty good, too, a fun little horror flick. I certainly want to see Return to House on Haunted Hill.

Some horror flicks I can't watch at night... unless I'm game for some nightmares. I don't really even mind nightmares too much, it's kind of like... an emotional ride. Sometimes it kind of fucks me up for a while after I wake up, though. Elmo figured House on Haunted Hill was not one of those movies that would give me nightmares. He was right. It isn't too much of a psychological thriller and it isn't a feasible plot.

Now we're watching Resident Evil. I think I've seen the third one. The movie is certainly good enough that it keeps distracting me from this entry. I think I'll go sit in the living room and watch it now.


msjorje: (Default)

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